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Getting “the spark” back with your partner

Posted at 11:56 AM, Dec 07, 2016
and last updated 2016-12-07 11:54:48-05

Winter snow and freezing temperatures are in the forecast, and snuggling is a nice way to stay warm and connected around the holidays. But when the libido is low or gone, the idea or even the mention of sex can create a tense situation between couples than a good feeling.

About 45 percent of women have concerns about sex, but only a small fraction of them talk with their doctor about it. Thankfully there are solutions for women with low sex drive, and bring the couple closer together.

Dr. Diana Bitner, a nationally recognized menopause specialist from Spectrum Health, says sex drive has many components. Many women worry that once they don't feel the urge, their sex drive is gone for good.

Sex drive does change over time, but that doesn't mean it's gone forever. But in order to start thinking about the level of sex drive, we have to talk about what makes up sex drive.

The first cause for low sex drive is physical, which includes pain with sex, vaginal dryness, performance anxiety, or even skin conditions like lichen sclerosis. Other physical causes include low estrogen or testosterone levels, depression, anxiety, physical inactivity, difficulty focusing, or other medical problems.

Psychological issues are another group that causes low sex drive. Stress from work, poor self image, history and fear of pain with sex, or a history of abuse (even if it's not from their current partner) are just a few of the issues that get in the way of couples and intimacy.

The final group of symptoms are interpersonal factors between the couple, which can be a wide range of issues or obstacles depending on the couple's relationship and trust with each other.

The best solution to fix low sex drive is to first talk with your partner about it. The subject might feel awkward, but it's a good idea to talk and put trust in them so you can figure out the components that are preventing a sexual relationship.

Afterwords, make an appointment with your medical provider so you can work out a solution to improve your sex drive. Remember, just because you have a low sex drive, doesn't mean it's gone forever. With the right discussions or treatments, you can feel comfortable and intimate in your relationship again.

Dr. Bitner's office is located at 3800 Lake Michigan Drive Northwest, Suite A. To schedule an appointment with her, call (616) 267-8225.

All information was provided by Dr. Diana Bitner and her blog. Read more.