ZEELAND, Mich. — Parents and loved ones of a 14-year-old in Zeeland took the podium at Monday night's school board meeting to demand answers and changes following the freshman's death by suicide last month.
"We can't bring Max back and there will be a part of our hearts that will be missing forever. But I want to take this time to promote change. So no other family has to experience the horrific pain that we've gone through," said Amy Ver Beek, Max's mom, during Monday's meeting.
The Ver Beeks told FOX 17 their son, Max, was given vodka the night of Zeeland West's first football game, allegedly by a classmate.
About two hours into the event, Dustin Ver Beek says he received a call that Max was sick and needed to be picked up.
They say Max was put to bed and had his phone taken away.
However, the next morning, they say they couldn't find Max or his car, and reported him missing.
A short time later, they say three deputies showed up to tell them Max crashed his car into a tree in Overisel Township.
The next day, the Ver Beeks say they found out about pictures and videos going around allegedly showing Max throwing up at the game.
They believe the images caused their son to take his life.
It's a topic that Dustin focused heavily on during Monday night's meeting.
"Max inadvertently started the movement when he died, a movement for kids who that were bullied and badgered and laughed at, at school. It's a movement of standing up for the little guy," said Max's dad, Dustin. "Societal failures begin at home. We know that we as parents need to wake up. We are raising little bullies who only find self-worth and social media image, brave behind the device but too scared to say it in person. Hiding behind handle names, our children are taunting each other to that. Social media is destroying our culture from within, which bleeds into our school systems, creating cancerous tumors."
During Monday's meeting, the district superintendent took a few moments to speak about Max's death and the impact it's had on the teen's family and Zeeland Public Schools as a whole.
She also reflected on why she didn't immediately reach out after hearing what happened.
"You know, I'm a human. I reflect on this over and over again, I made the decision not to reach out because today was the first day I've ever seen them, I didn't have an established relationship with them. And oh, how I wish I did with every single family member in this district. I don't. I didn't know them. I chose to give them space and time, again, to try to imagine how to deal with what they have just been told and felt like my voice as a stranger would do nothing more than upset them further," said Superintendent Dr. Brandi-Lyn Mendham. "You do the best you can in the moment, and then you reflect on it and you learn and grow. And I certainly want you all to know that that's that's something I don't take lightly. I've had a few conversations with the parents since then. And then told them that their feedback has helped change the course of my career and the way that I handle these calls forevermore. It'll be an uncomfortable and it may be the wrong thing to reach out. But given how this resonated with them, I won't question and I'll just make that call. But I'm definitely going to share it with them over and over my deepest apologies because I never wanted that to appear insensitive. My heart broke for them."
Superintendent Mendham also says the administration has been meeting regularly since Max's death and will review policies brought up Monday to determine how to best implement any possible changes.
The district also hopes to meet with Max's family and help them in their mission of suicide prevention.
The Ver Beeks have started a website in Max's honor to help others who may be struggling.
If you or someone you know may need help, you can always contact the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988.
